Excuse me?

Jan 5, 2007 at 8:44 PM
2 comments

I was reading this article. First of all, holy shit. That's an amazing story. But then they had a little bit about the guy from the other day who jumped on to a subway track to save another guy that had just had a seizure, and that's all amazing and all, but read the last paragraph, about what he was awarded.

Highest civic award... good... good... $10k from Trump... nice, good... Ok... Disney Land? Oh yes... nice... Very nice indeed... what else now? Free subway travel for a year..

Do you see what's wrong with this picture?

Free subway travel for A YEAR?? What the fuck?? Dude SAVED SOMEONE'S LIFE. He only gets free subway for a year?? That's bullshit, man. That guy should never have to pay for the subway ever ever ever again. The transit authority and all of New York owe that guy a huge debt.

In fact, he shouldn't ever have to pay for Subway sandwiches either.

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Comments

[this is good]

Yeah, but if they gave him free subway travel for LIFE, some idiot would start pushing people off the platform just to "save" them and get...free subway travel for life. Sets a precedent, you know? We can't have that. In fact, the guy did a very unsafe thing - I mean, TWO people could've been killed (one of whom might have arguably saved a life, during his lifetime, and thus been worth more in bean-counter-speak). Think of the lawsuits that might have been. He should have been fined; he should consider himself lucky to get free subway travel for a year.

For what it's worth, I agree with you - the foregoing (in case any of our readers are humor-impaired) was entirely tongue-in-cheek. Now I think my tongue'th stuck...dammit. Iths gwnn be hrd to eat peanut buther thith way.